Dancing with Grief

Dancing with Grief

THE DANCE OF GRIEF

There is no one way that is right. Its what’s right for you.

“Grief never ends… But it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith… It is the price of love.”
— Unknown


I see Grief as a Dance.

You may go left, and then right. You may go forward for a few weeks and then back. There is a flow to this dance that we’ve been invited to participate in, at this moment, at this time in life.

We move in the direction that feels right, its our dance.

What feels right for you, may be completely different for me. We are all in different stages of our dance.

Through it all, keep watch for the blessings that come your way. Be grateful, for even the smallest joys.

One day you may realize, that you have the strength to support someone else who may be where you were in the last stage of your dance.

Remember, this dance is yours.
Be patient, kind and respectful of yourself.
Do it your way. Dance with grace.
Be gentle with yourself when you need gentleness.
Be strong, when you need strength.

Dance Your Way.💗

 

If you know the grief of pregnancy loss, then I invite you to join my Facebook group, Peace after Pregnancy Loss.

This space is perfect for moms and dads who have experienced pregnancy loss at any time in your life, as it’s never too late to feel peace after pregnancy loss! 

PEACE AFTER PREGNANCY LOSS

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She dove deep into spiritual practice and became a reiki and meditation teacher. She’s an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting heart-centered women who have experienced the emotional trauma of pregnancy loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.
How to Cope with Guilt after Pregnancy Loss

How to Cope with Guilt after Pregnancy Loss

Have you been watching the Soul Sessions Series?

We’ve been talking about the different emotions of grief that we might experience and this week is all about GUILT!

What it is. How it affects us and some coping skills to support us through this!

Now we all experience guilt throughout our lives from childhood and beyond, but this week we’re talking about how we allow guilt to express its nasty negativity at a time in our life when we’re feeling so vulnerable!

After Pregnancy Loss.

Guilt can mess with our mind and make us believe things about ourselves that simply aren’t true.

It creates a space of self-blame or repressed anger, that we put on ourselves rather than expressing it verbally toward someone else. It eats away on our nerves and effects us mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

I found this quote by Louise Hay and it really made me think!

 

“Guilt is a totally useless emotion. It never makes anyone feel better, nor does it change a situation”. Louise Hay – You Can Heal Your Life.

How true is that?!

Guilt is a useless emotion that we use to punish ourselves rather than show compassion and forgiveness to the part of us that is in pain!

When we experience Guilt, we feel as though we’ve done something wrong and the questions of WHAT IF? WHY ME? WHAT DID I DO WRONG? IF ONLY? AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH?

Each of these begin to play a big role in our thought process!

What if?  What if I had been healthier? What if I had taken better care of my body?

Why me? I wanted that baby so badly. Why can some women have babies so easily?

What did I do wrong? I thought I was doing everything right, how could this have happened? How could I have prevented this?

Am I not good enough?

I’ve asked these questions myself and I’ll bet you have too!

These questions often lead to self-blame, self-judgement and low self-esteem.

The thing about guilt is that it doesn’t just go away, yet there are steps that you can take to support yourself no matter where you are in your healing journey.

The first thing you can do is Recognize your Feelings.

If there is something that needs changing in your life, now is the time to create an awareness of that.

Then, whether there’s any truth to your feelings or not, Name It.

I feel guilty because…..

By not naming our feelings, whatever they are, we’re unable to come to terms with our loss and emotions.

Too often, our feelings of grief are buried deep in our psyche and we never get any real closure.

So what do we do next?

Recognize whose voice you’re listening to. 

Are you listening to the voice of truth? Or the voice of lies? The voice of your heart will always leave you feeling a sense of peace. The voice of guilt will leave you feeling constricted, fearful and feeling small.

I leave you with this… Choose the one that will raise your vibration to one of peace.

Seek Forgiveness.

This is a big one and its highly unlikely that you did anything wrong and certainly NO ONE blames you!

Forgiveness is for you and you alone. By forgiving yourself, you begin to release the hold that the feeling of guilt plays a part of in your life and allows a new feeling of peace to be created.

I love to use affirmations with my healing work and here are some that I thought you might enjoy too!

I am at peace.

I now release all guilt, struggle and blame.

I am full of love, compassion and peace for myself and my life.

I allow myself to soften and relax.

 

 

Come join our community of heart-centered women, where we come together here to support each other, share, connect and create new friendships through grief and healing.

Peace after Pregnancy Loss

 

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred . Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.
12 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart after Miscarriage

12 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart after Miscarriage

Here you’ll find my Top 12 ways to support your own healing after miscarriage…

JOURNAL:  When I began to like I was ready to heal my broken heart after years of holding onto the grief and sadness of my miscarriages, I didn’t know how to release the tremendous pain that I felt and yet still hold on to the memory of my babies. A friend suggested I journal. Soon I found myself writing letters to each of my babies and through putting pen to paper, I realized that my soul craved the quiet time of reflection, connection, release and honoring.

FEEL ALL OF YOUR FEELINGS:  This is so hard yet its an integral step to healing your heartache. Lean into the depths of your soul and let your feelings rise. Recognize each one of them, honor them, the dark ones and the light ones. If you don’t give yourself the time and space to fully grieve through it all, it will come back in some other form.

CRYSTALS FOR GRIEF:  Rose Quartz, I’ve carried it in my pockets, laid it under my pillow and kept it close by my journal when I write. I love this crystal! The rose quartz is a crystal for unconditional love, it supports the heart during times of heavy grief and sadness.

Apache Tears, this is one I’ve recently been introduced to. There’s a legend that goes with this stone which you can look up, but Apache Tears is very supportive during grief and helps to keep you in the present moment rather than the past.

Ruby Zoisite, another favourite, helps to release heartache.

Mangano Calcite a very gentle stone for when you feel like you are drowning in grief, it makes you feel as though your angels are wrapping you in love.

The rose quartz is a crystal for unconditional love, it supports the heart during times of heavy grief and sadness.

CEREMONY: This can be as special or sacred as you like. You could plant a tree in memory of your baby. You could gather your family, light a candle and say a prayer or write a poem that you’ll always treasure. You may want to blow up some biodegradable balloons and release them on your baby’s first birthday.  Make this exactly what you need to support your healing.

ABSOLUTE ROSE OIL: Just a tiny drop on your finger to gently massage into your heart chakra (both front and back) When your heart feels broken, this will support you to keep an open heart.

COZY UP IN YOUR FAVORITE BLANKET: No words needed here, sometimes this is like a hug from your favorite granny.

CLEAR THE ENERGY OF YOUR SPACE:  Use sage, a bay leaf, incense or an essential oil diffuser to clear any negative energy in your home. Be sure to open a window or two to all the smoke and negative energy to pass through your home.

NAME YOUR BABY: For some parents this may be too difficult to do. If your baby passed very early,some parents choose for something simple like peanut or jellybean. Yet for others, it makes their baby more real. Honor your heart in all you do and if this is right for you, then the perfect name will present itself.

JEWELRY: Honor yourself and your baby with a beautiful piece of jewelry that will commemorate the month they were to be born. You’ll always have a little piece of them close to your heart.

CREATE A SACRED MEMORY BOX:  This can be such a special opportunity to pour your heart into something beautiful for yourself and your little angel. In here, you can place your journal or any little treasures you collected for this baby. Sometimes you need to do something creative when your feelings are just so overwhelming and creating a memory box can feel so comforting. This is a wonderful idea, you could line it with silk and put a little teddy bear in there, your pregnancy test stick, a letter or any other little mementos.

SELF CARE: Whether you have a luxurious bubble bath, book a massage, buy some flowers or gather your family and friends, make time that you can devote to some sacred self care.

SEE A COUNSELOR, HEALER OR GRIEF COACH:  If you’ve recently lost your baby, your pain may be very raw. Healing your heartache of your pregnancy loss is a very personal choice. You must go through this healing journey; however, you can do it a way that is right you.  Please ensure you seek the support that will be helpful to you right now. You do not have to go through this alone.

 

 

If you’ve got questions or would you like to have support through your healing journey, I invite you to connect with me for a free 20 minute Soul Care Call

You’re welcome to join myself and other women in my supportive Face Book group, Peace after Pregnancy Loss .

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred . Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.

Seeds of Grace

Seeds of Grace

Seeds of Grace…

There’s something about this word, Grace, that feels like a deep call from my soul, a remembering.

Each year, I choose a new word to guide me, to reach toward. A word that will help me to grow into the person I desire to become.

I chose my word(s) for this year and here we are in June; I can see already how far I’ve come with those words as my guiding force.

Yet; there is another word that keeps rising from deep inside. GRACE. I have a feeling this will be my word for 2019.

She leads me already. Whispering, guiding me, filling me up and making me feel whole.

Lean toward grace is another phrase that rises from deep within.

With all of this, its difficult to say exactly what grace is.

Even Saint Augustine asked the question….

“What is grace?

I know until you ask me; when you ask me, I do not know.” – Saint Augustine

 

What is Grace

 

I feel as though I’ve barely touched the surface of it.

The dictionary explains it as:

NOUN – simple elegance or refinement of movement.

VERB – do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one’s presence.

And yet, it feels much more than this.

I watch the birds fly through the air, and they move with such grace. I see the look in my pets eyes, and I see unconditional love there.

It’s something that has called me since I began this path of awakening or spiritual awareness. Its what I feel in moments of pure joy.

I feel it rising in me Every. Single. Time. that I give Reiki to a client. It’s an energy that flows from deep inside, up through my heart and out through my hands.

I once did a future visualization to meet the woman that is my guide, 20 years in my future. When I asked her name, she simply stated Grace. It wasn’t until the end of this visualization that I realized that woman is actually me, my future self, and her name is Grace. This left me in awe, and still does today!

Grace is a virtue that I long to embrace.

When I’ve experienced it, I felt unconditional love, pure joy, peace and ultimately, compassion.

I recently had a moment that deeply affected me. I was shocked at how deeply I felt these emotions and yet it gave me a profound awareness of some deep rooted emotional pain that needed to be healed. I would not have been aware of this, had I not had the experience. Through all of this, I was blessed with a friend who showed me true grace. It was through her selfless expression of grace, truth and compassion, that made all of this rise up inside of me once again.

It was another seed that had been planted.

We’ve all experienced moments of grace, even if we couldn’t exactly put our finger on it.  So how do I experience it?

I experience Grace through Compassion. Beauty. Peace. Strength. Truth. Gratitude. Joy. Love. Gentleness. Kindness.  All of these and so much more!

What about you?  I would love to hear how you have experienced grace in your life?

The world needs more grace.

Let’s continue planting these seeds!

 

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.

 

Be Patient with your Grief

Be Patient with your Grief

Be patient with your grief,
It’s is such a personal thing,
Healing your heartache of pregnancy loss takes time, 
BE PATIENT
 
Lost in a tangle of emotions from deep sadness to shame;
Devastation, guilt, loneliness. Grief by nature is lonely.
As hard as it can be to admit, even jealousy and anger..
BE PATIENT
 
Whatever you feel inside, let your feelings rise.
Now is your time to navigate these muddy waters of emotions.
Honor the space you’re in, YOU ARE HEALING.
BE PATIENT
 
Your tears may well over and flow endlessly;
You may turn inward to work through your grief;
Its ok to be sad for yourself and still happy for others, just
BE PATIENT
 
You may feel empty inside.
Or lose your appetite.
You may want to sleep and hide away from loved ones.
PLEASE BE PATIENT
 
This will pass,
In this moment, every thought and feeling is a journey of its own.
Feel what you are feeling, let your emotions rise.
This is your healing.
BE PATIENT
 
Grief has no timeline.
Your heartache will lighten,
You will learn to honor your baby
In a way that’s right for you;
For now, this time is for you.
BE PATIENT
 
In the depths of your heartache,
Always remember,
You do not journey alone,
Sisters, past, present and future stand by your side’
Lifting you, reminding you….
You are strong.
Your light is still burning inside.
You may not see it now, you may not feel it.
You are more courageous, passionate and powerful than you know.
Sister, you are a powerful being of light!
YOUR LIGHT STILL SHINES TRUE.

If you’ve got questions or would you like to have support through your healing journey, I invite you to connect with me for a free 20 minute Soul Care Call

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.

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