12 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart after Miscarriage

12 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart after Miscarriage

Here you’ll find my Top 12 ways to support your own healing after miscarriage…

JOURNAL:  When I began to like I was ready to heal my broken heart after years of holding onto the grief and sadness of my miscarriages, I didn’t know how to release the tremendous pain that I felt and yet still hold on to the memory of my babies. A friend suggested I journal. Soon I found myself writing letters to each of my babies and through putting pen to paper, I realized that my soul craved the quiet time of reflection, connection, release and honoring.

FEEL ALL OF YOUR FEELINGS:  This is so hard yet its an integral step to healing your heartache. Lean into the depths of your soul and let your feelings rise. Recognize each one of them, honor them, the dark ones and the light ones. If you don’t give yourself the time and space to fully grieve through it all, it will come back in some other form.

CRYSTALS FOR GRIEF:  Rose Quartz, I’ve carried it in my pockets, laid it under my pillow and kept it close by my journal when I write. I love this crystal! The rose quartz is a crystal for unconditional love, it supports the heart during times of heavy grief and sadness.

Apache Tears, this is one I’ve recently been introduced to. There’s a legend that goes with this stone which you can look up, but Apache Tears is very supportive during grief and helps to keep you in the present moment rather than the past.

Ruby Zoisite, another favourite, helps to release heartache.

Mangano Calcite a very gentle stone for when you feel like you are drowning in grief, it makes you feel as though your angels are wrapping you in love.

The rose quartz is a crystal for unconditional love, it supports the heart during times of heavy grief and sadness.

CEREMONY: This can be as special or sacred as you like. You could plant a tree in memory of your baby. You could gather your family, light a candle and say a prayer or write a poem that you’ll always treasure. You may want to blow up some biodegradable balloons and release them on your baby’s first birthday.  Make this exactly what you need to support your healing.

ABSOLUTE ROSE OIL: Just a tiny drop on your finger to gently massage into your heart chakra (both front and back) When your heart feels broken, this will support you to keep an open heart.

COZY UP IN YOUR FAVOURITE BLANKET: No words needed here, sometimes this is like a hug from your favourite granny.

CLEAR THE ENERGY OF YOUR SPACE:  Use sage, a bay leaf, incense or an essential oil diffuser to clear any negative energy in your home. Be sure to open a window or two to all the smoke and negative energy to pass through your home.

NAME YOUR BABY: For some parents this may be too difficult to do. If your baby passed very early,some parents choose for something simple like peanut or jellybean. Yet for others, it makes their baby more real. Honor your heart in all you do and if this is right for you, then the perfect name will present itself.

JEWELRY: Honor yourself and your baby with a beautiful piece of jewelry that will commemorate the month they were to be born. You’ll always have a little piece of them close to your heart.

CREATE A SACRED MEMORY BOX:  This can be such a special opportunity to pour your heart into something beautiful for yourself and your little angel. In here, you can place your journal or any little treasures you collected for this baby. Sometimes you need to do something creative when your feelings are just so overwhelming and creating a memory box can feel so comforting. This is a wonderful idea, you could line it with silk and put a little teddy bear in there, your pregnancy test stick, a letter or any other little mementos.

SELF CARE: Whether you have a luxurious bubble bath, book a massage, buy some flowers or gather your family and friends, make time that you can devote to some sacred self care.

SEE A COUNSELOR, HEALER OR GRIEF COACH:  If you’ve recently lost your baby, your pain may be very raw. Healing your heartache of your pregnancy loss is a very personal choice. You must go through this healing journey; however, you can do it a way that is right you.  Please ensure you seek the support that will be helpful to you right now. You do not have to go through this alone.

 

 

If you’ve got questions or would you like to have support through your healing journey, I invite you to connect with me for a free 20 minute Soul Care Call

 

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred . Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.

Seeds of Grace

Seeds of Grace

Seeds of Grace…

There’s something about this word, Grace, that feels like a deep call from my soul, a remembering.

Each year, I choose a new word to guide me, to reach toward. A word that will help me to grow into the person I desire to become.

I chose my word(s) for this year and here we are in June; I can see already how far I’ve come with those words as my guiding force.

Yet; there is another word that keeps rising from deep inside. GRACE. I have a feeling this will be my word for 2019.

She leads me already. Whispering, guiding me, filling me up and making me feel whole.

Lean toward grace is another phrase that rises from deep within.

With all of this, its difficult to say exactly what grace is.

Even Saint Augustine asked the question….

“What is grace?

I know until you ask me; when you ask me, I do not know.” – Saint Augustine

 

What is Grace

 

I feel as though I’ve barely touched the surface of it.

The dictionary explains it as:

NOUN – simple elegance or refinement of movement.

VERB – do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one’s presence.

And yet, it feels much more than this.

I watch the birds fly through the air, and they move with such grace. I see the look in my pets eyes, and I see unconditional love there.

It’s something that has called me since I began this path of awakening or spiritual awareness. Its what I feel in moments of pure joy.

I feel it rising in me Every. Single. Time. that I give Reiki to a client. It’s an energy that flows from deep inside, up through my heart and out through my hands.

I once did a future visualization to meet the woman that is my guide, 20 years in my future. When I asked her name, she simply stated Grace. It wasn’t until the end of this visualization that I realized that woman is actually me, my future self, and her name is Grace. This left me in awe, and still does today!

Grace is a virtue that I long to embrace.

When I’ve experienced it, I felt unconditional love, pure joy, peace and ultimately, compassion.

I recently had a moment that deeply affected me. I was shocked at how deeply I felt these emotions and yet it gave me a profound awareness of some deep rooted emotional pain that needed to be healed. I would not have been aware of this, had I not had the experience. Through all of this, I was blessed with a friend who showed me true grace. It was through her selfless expression of grace, truth and compassion, that made all of this rise up inside of me once again.

It was another seed that had been planted.

We’ve all experienced moments of grace, even if we couldn’t exactly put our finger on it.  So how do I experience it?

I experience Grace through Compassion. Beauty. Peace. Strength. Truth. Gratitude. Joy. Love. Gentleness. Kindness.  All of these and so much more!

What about you?  I would love to hear how you have experienced grace in your life?

The world needs more grace.

Let’s continue planting these seeds!

 

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.

 

Healing through Acceptance

Healing through Acceptance

Healing through Acceptance is a process…

We seldom consider the experience that our heart, mind and body must go through to reach this place of acceptance, to allow our experience to process in area of our life, emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually.

Healing is a time of transformation; as we release the dreams, heartache and sorrow to make room for something new.

Acceptance

Peace

Grace

In order to heal, we must be willing to release and more often then not, there is a breakdown before there is breakthrough. In my experience, I’ve noticed that the journey to healing comes in waves.

Just when you feel like you finally have control, that you’ve fully accepted your circumstances and all is smooth sailing, along comes a rogue wave that sends you crashing to the depths, feeling the pain all over again!

It took me years to find peace with the loss of my pregnancies. There were times that I felt like it was all water under the bridge, and then I would see children the age that mine would be, walking to school, riding bikes, just living life and the wave would wash over me once again. Bringing up all the emotions long buried, feeling the heartache all over again.

It wasn’t until I finally became aware that I hadn’t truly accepted the fact that I was not going to be a mother, that this lifetime would pass me by without having the opportunity to experience all that motherhood entailed, did I finally genuinely embrace the courage to release my heartache.

What I’ve found with healing, is that the memory never leaves;

The sadness is always a small undercurrent of emotion, I still shed tears and feel the emptiness at times; but with acceptance comes peace and slowly a transformation takes place.

Let your heart be your guide. It knows what’s best for you.

  • Be sure to give your body rest, to nourish it with nutritious food and strengthen it with exercise.
  • Create some space for joy!
  • Share your story in whatever way you can, as speaking of your loss brings healing.
  • If you have no one to share with, then write. Pour your heart and soul into writing, and amazing soulful healing take place within your heart.

It’s been 16 years now since my first miscarriage, with several others to follow and though at times the sadness is still felt in my heart and the tears still flow, I now hold it in a different space.

Where in the past, I felt such shame and heartache, I now have an appreciation for the life that I have and for the people I share my life with. I find new ways to be grateful.

My hope is that in being open with my journey, that it will allow you to find peace with yours.

Every woman who heals herself, heals all the women who came before her and all the women who come after her. – Dr. Christine Northrup

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.  http://www.traceyswainson.com 

 

Photo Credit:  Antonina Bukowska

What Does it Mean to Heal?

What Does it Mean to Heal?

What does it mean to heal?

heal…

verb

  1. (of a person or treatment) cause (a wound, injury, or person) to become sound or healthy again.
  2. To make or become well again.

 

I am passionate about helping women heal their stories.

When a woman heals her own heart, she not only heals her story but that of her mother, her grandmothers, her ancestors and all her daughters yet to come. Her whole world receives the blessing of this healing.

The journey through self-healing is not an easy road; it asks of you to connect with your shadow self, to view it through the lens of love and light. It can bring up painful memories of the past, memories long buried. Yet by shining love into those dark spaces you allow for personal healing to begin. This takes so much courage and not everyone is able to go there.

 

What are you ready to heal?

The heartache of a lost baby, born or unborn? The story of your past?

Words spoken that hurt so deeply you can still feel the pain today? Actions of others that have left an imprint on your heart and soul?

All of these are like shackles that keep you from living the life of your dreams; they hold you down, they hold you back. Keeping you in the past.

I’ve been there. I understand the heartache. I also know how freeing it can be to make that decision to heal your past, to release the pain.

I honor the journey that you’re taking, I know the courage that lies within you;

As you begin this healing journey, know this…

You already have everything within you that you need to heal.

Support your inner healing and personal growth with sacred self-care.

And remember, the strength of all those sisters who came before you; most did the best they could with what they knew and the spirit within them, also lies within you.

You are an amazing, courageous woman, you have within you the power to change your world.

 

When one woman heals, magic happens!

  • Her heart is filled with compassion;
  • Peace lights her soul;
  • Inner darkness transforms into light;
  • Gratitude now lights her way;
  • Feelings of emptiness make room for new purpose;
  • Her healing creates a foundation of inner strength that cannot be broken.

 

Every woman who heals herself, heals all the women who came before her and all the women who come after her. – Dr. Christine Northrup

 

 

If you’ve got questions or would you like to have support through your healing journey,

I invite you to connect with me for a free 20 minute Soul Care Call

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.  http://www.traceyswainson.com 
In Loving Memory of the Children I Never Knew

In Loving Memory of the Children I Never Knew

Miscarriage…

 

There’s such sadness in that word.

I remember the day I realized our life was about to change, in a BIG way.

I dreamed of all the miracles that were ahead and felt indescribable joy!

I was filled with excitement, already in love with our baby.

Then… the unthinkable happened.

Heart broken, I realized that my dreams were lost. Helpless, my world came crashing down. My babies left before I had a chance to hold them in my arms.

My husband and I have had five miscarriages. Its such a lonely experience and in my pain I kept quiet as many do by the common thought to not reveal your pregnancy until you’ve safely past the first trimester.

It’s a commonly known fact that one in four pregnancies ends with miscarriage, usually before three months, this allows a woman to keep her secret.

While there are many cultures who honor the baby who passes before birth, some carry out rituals, others have baby-naming ceremonies, sadly our culture does nothing. This just adds to the emotional and psychological grief that a woman experiences. Strangely, it makes sense, if you tell no one of your pregnancy then there’s no one to know of your heartache.

What are you to do when you’re all alone in your sadness? How was I to react when the comments of misguided love came my way. “It wasn’t meant to be” or “Not to worry, you’ll have another.”

For years I wondered who I was as a woman who had had multiple miscarriages, yet never was blessed to be a mother. What do you say when people ask “How many kids do you have?”

I felt so much shame in having to give an answer.  It was easier to keep silent and hide in grief and loneliness.

None of these emotions can help heal. 

There is no joy in the depths of this pain.

After years of holding on to so much shame, I finally realized I was no longer going to live like this. By no fault of my own did I lose my babies, I was finally ready to make peace with my loss. Miscarriage does not define me. I am so much more than that.

I became aware of who I had allowed myself to become and consciously made the decision to allow my heart to heal.  My morning rituals of meditation, journaling and energy healing created space inside my heart for those raw emotions to rise to the surface.  I began to feel a deep sense of healing and with the support of a dear friend who was able to ask the questions that I’ve been longing for someone to ask, she helped me to express my feelings in a new way, with this came blissful, soulful peace.

I will never forget my little ones; they will always have a special place in my heart.
In loving memory.

 

If you’ve got questions or would you like to have support through your healing journey,

I invite you to connect with me for a free 20 minute Soul Care Call

 

Tracey Swainson is wife and fur baby mama, first and foremost. She’s also an intuitive healer and mentor, passionate about supporting women as they heal their heartache of pregnancy loss and the stories that may have been created due to the emotional trauma of their loss. She brings healing both to the spiritual and physical bodies through intimate, sacred, supportive one on one sessions. It was the emotional and spiritual healing of her own pregnancy loss experiences that fully birthed her into this sacred work. Tracey empowers women to transform their broken hearts and guides them to remember their inherent truth so they can gain closure and heal from the inside – out.  http://www.traceyswainson.com 

 

 

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